5.12.2010

Adventures in Mommyhood

Motherhood is an adventure for me, one that on most days brings a range of emotions. There are several times I feel frustrated. Sometimes at my kids and sometimes at myself. Sometimes we're bored. Sometimes we're excited. Lately, though, I just want to laugh! Motherhood brings me so much joy!


I've had a few experiences in the last couple of weeks that just make me laugh. While they were happening, I wasn't laughing, but when I think back, laughing seems like the only appropriate response! 


Last week I had an experience at Kroger that some of you may have already heard about, but I'm going to share it again (now that I'm far removed from the situation). Collin and Bailey were sharing the "car" cart, as they must do when I shop with both of them. Sometimes they have a great time in there together, but this was not one of those days. I get through my shopping as quickly as I could, and had even bribed Collin with lunchables in turn for good behavior, including not being too loud (don't act like you don't bribe your children, I know you do). This is a very small store and Collin's voice carries! Eventually we got to the check out line (with our lunchables) and Bailey decided she'd had enough closeness with her brother. She started biting and hitting him. (side note: Collin abuses Bailey as much as he can, and she can take it pretty well, but only for so long, and eventually all of her pent up anger comes out in the form of biting, hitting, scratching, poking, or some other form of physical retaliation. When the time comes, she's pretty good at defending herself.) Anyway...we started checking out and the sweet lady scanning my groceries had to take care of a price discrepancy. Sometimes I don't care about the price difference, but lately my family of four with a single income (that wants to buy a house) causes me to care. Once everything was taken care of and I started to pay, the checker one row over decided she needed to intervene. She started loudly participating in Collin & Bailey's little spat. I had already been on the ground and talked to them about their behavior (reminding Bailey that we love Brother and treat him with kindness, and reminding Collin that yelling is not the appropriate response when Sister is treating him like that). This lady proceeded to shout "uh uh, she's hitting him, she's poking him, he's yelling" as if I was completely unaware of their behavior! She stopped doing her job and her line was getting longer. I'm not sure who was louder, she or Collin! I whisked my horrible, misbehaving children out of the store and got them separated and into their own car seats as quickly as I could manage. Collin noticed I was a little flustered and frustrated and didn't understand why that lady was yelling about him and his sister, so after explaining it to him, he said "No mom, she doesn't tell you how to take care of your kids, God does that!" As we drove out of the parking lot several thoughts passed through my mind. First I realized just how wise Collin is and how fast he seems to be growing up these days. Then it occurred to me that he really does hear the things I say! Wow! I'm really not talking to a brick wall! 


Today I had another experience that wasn't quite as dramatic, but still made me laugh! Bailey and I took a grocery shopping trip to Wal-Mart (since I need some time away from Kroger after that last incident). I've started this new thing where I don't bring a diaper bag if I'm going somewhere that I know I'm not going to change a diaper. If she poops while we're grocery shopping, I'd rather not risk picking up some nasty GI virus from the changing station in the wal-mart bathroom. I'll just finish my shopping as  quickly as possible, as far as possible from other people. I just had my purse, because I don't like to carry stuff I don't need. Bailey is a great shopping buddy. She likes to talk about things we see and we have great learning opportunities while we're shopping. Today she saw me crossing off items on my list with my pen, so she decided she needed to draw, too. I found another pen in my purse (because I don't have anymore crayons-we've used them all) and a business card (because I needed my list and that was the next largest piece of paper I had in my purse). Now, let me back up...Bailey loves wearing her boots and skirts, but she decided when she was in the cart that she didn't want to deal with her boots falling off, so she just took them and her socks off. Ok, back to where we were...Bailey was having fun crossing things off her list, but she ran out of list items (I guess) while I had my back turned to pick out some shaving cream or something like that. When I turned back around she had moved on to her feet. She was drawing on her feet with a pen. Both of them. I quickly took the pen and told her we don't write on our bodies (so she looked in her shirt for her "bodies"). I just couldn't get upset. All I could do was laugh!


There are times I get stares from well-meaning (I hope) strangers, but I just can't let it get to me. Kids act like kids and we shouldn't be surprised when that happens! My kids are awesome! I love them both so much. There are times when I feel like I'm failing my kids by not spending enough focused time with them or by not teaching them enough or by not keeping their environment perfectly clean and safe. But they're still alive and still without major injuries or illnesses and they are learning at an appropriate pace. They are such unique individuals that bring me so much joy! I love being a mom! 

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